As the ten thousand highways unfold their doors for the ten thousand standing on Nineveh’s shores, where the blood of a husband silences wars for the girl who arises to meet him.
And she sings “World! I’ve overcome you. World, I’ve overcome by my song and the blood of a son.”
I love it when I am reading and suddenly I stumble across a gem of a sentence like this one: To sum up, strophe four is the voice of Yahweh the mother.
I think that is the most incredible sentence I have read in a very long time.
I don’t do well with leaving things unresolved… at all.
And sometimes I am way too blunt.
and it is the job of the beloved to be loved outrageously.
I don’t really know what it is I want to do with the rest of my life exactly. I know very vague generalities but I have no idea what it’s all going to look like. This semester I have become comfortable with not knowing for the first time in my life. Today I was meeting with a very near and dear friend and in the process of our conversation she told me that she had written my mission statement, she said, “You are a leader of leaders, and an influencer of influencers.” And yeah, I really like that.
sometimes the only thing I want in life is to be able to poop in privacy.
I guess that’s too much to ask for when you live on a college campus.
Being passive aggressive doesn’t solve anything if the other person doesn’t notice your passivity.
Six years ago today a tragic accident changed my life forever. For me, November 1, 2002 is a day that will live on in infamy. While the overwhelming sadness of the tragedy is, for the most part, over… thinking about the situation is still sobering and thought provoking.
Today was the most beautiful autumn day, the kind you can’t help but be happy about… on top of which I have had the most incredible time with two of my good friends… but for the whole day in the background of my mind everything wasn’t all bright, clear skies and leaves turned orange and red.
I have been thinking a lot about all that has been given to me and all that has been sacrificed for me. I tend to think only and always about the negative things that have happened in my life, feeling sorry for myself which gives me an excuse to be angry or mad or… whatever.
But today I realized how much has been sacrificed for me… even to the point of someone giving his life for me… to inspire me to live a life of passion and to make a difference and to think of others besides myself… others who haven’t been given as much as I have.
Jesus said that to whom much is given much is required… I have been given so much… and I have given in return very little.
Jesus, teach me to live a life of passion… teach me what is truly important… let me not be comfortable in my complacency. Thank you so much for Stephen… and all who have sacrificed for me and given to me. And thank you mostly for your sacrifice… you are wonderful, my beautiful friend.
Welcome to the fall out
Welcome to resistance
The tension is here, the tension is here
Between who you are and who you could be
Between how it is and how it should be
I dare you to move, I dare you to move
I dare you to lift yourself up off the floor
I dare you to move, I dare you to move
Like today never happened, today never happened before
I haven’t listened to this song in forever… but it came on the radio today… call it a coincidence… but the day I started getting past my bitterness and allowed myself to learn from Steve’s death was the day this song started holding meaning for me…
Thoughts. I write to understand myself. I write to stay sane–at least relatively sane. Where have I been all this while? In a whirlwind of time, I know. Its crazy how this whirlwind is always blowing and just picks up speed as it goes. I love windstorms and I love the thought of being “gone with the wind” not realizing that I am almost always gone with this crazy, maddening wind and I really can’t stand it. I wish I could step out of this insanity. I wish I could get caught up into God’s reality, to see him as he is–to see the earth as it is–to enter into what Dr. Moore calls “the sanity of God.” It’s the reality of God coming alive in my mind that I’m after. It’s the truth of how it all works that I long to understand. I don’t like being like the Jews of Judah–a refusing generation. And I don’t want to be like the burning remnant either. I want to be the regenerating generation that the root of holiness springs up out of. But perhaps in order to become fertile ground we have to go though a process–the Israelites did in the wilderness. The first generation of Exodites were refusers and it wasn’t until they were weeded out that they got to enter into their promises.
Jesus and Holy Spirit and Papa!
Weed me out–every bit of me that refuses to hear and see and understand you. Weed out of me the idolatrous who raises “bloody hands” to a god that doesn’t exist. Consecrate me and make me holy–that I would lift up holy hands to you only. My heart burns and longs for you and I want to yearn for you in a deeper way! I want to long for you the way you long for me Jesus!
Papa, teach yourself to me.
